Shakespeare's Love's Labour's Lost 5. Love's Labour's Lost.
Please see the bottom of the page for explanatory notes. PRINCESS Nothing but this! KATHARINE Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too. ROSALINE You'll ne'er be friends with him; a' kill'd your sister. KATHARINE He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy; And so she died: had she been light, like you, Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit, She might ha' been a grandam ere she died: And so may you; for a light heart lives long. ROSALINE What's your dark meaning, mouse, of this light word? KATHARINE A light condition in a beauty dark.
ROSALINE We need more light to find your meaning out. KATHARINE You'll mar the light by taking it in snuff; Therefore I'll darkly end the argument. ROSALINE Look what you do, you do it still i' the dark. KATHARINE So do not you, for you are a light wench. ROSALINE Indeed I weigh not you, and therefore light.
KATHARINE You weigh me not? O, that's you care not for me. ROSALINE Great reason; for 'past cure is still past care.' PRINCESS Well bandied both; a set of wit well play'd. But Rosaline, you have a favour too: 3.
Who sent it? ROSALINE I would you knew: An if my face were but as fair as yours, My favour were as great; be witness this. Nay, I have verses too, I thank Biron: The numbers true; and, were the numbering too, I were the fairest goddess on the ground: I am compared to twenty thousand fairs. ROSALINE Much in the letters; nothing in the praise. PRINCESS Beauteous as ink; a good conclusion. KATHARINE Fair as a text B in a copy- book.
ROSALINE 'Ware pencils, ho! KATHARINE A pox of that jest! PRINCESS But, Katharine, what was sent to you from fair Dumain? KATHARINE Madam, this glove. PRINCESS Did he not send you twain? KATHARINE Yes, madam, and moreover Some thousand verses of a faithful lover, 5. A huge translation of hypocrisy, Vilely compiled, profound simplicity.
MARIA This and these pearls to me sent Longaville: The letter is too long by half a mile. PRINCESS I think no less. Dost thou not wish in heart The chain were longer and the letter short?
MARIA Ay, or I would these hands might never part. PRINCESS We are wise girls to mock our lovers so. ROSALINE They are worse fools to purchase mocking so. PRINCESS None are so surely caught, when they are catch'd, As wit turn'd fool: folly, in wisdom hatch'd, 7. Hath wisdom's warrant and the help of school And wit's own grace to grace a learned fool. ROSALINE The blood of youth burns not with such excess As gravity's revolt to wantonness.
MARIA Folly in fools bears not so strong a note As foolery in the wise, when wit doth dote; Since all the power thereof it doth apply To prove, by wit, worth in simplicity. PRINCESS Here comes Boyet, and mirth is in his face.
BOYET O, I am stabb'd with laughter! PRINCESS Thy news Boyet? BOYET Prepare, madam, prepare! What are they That charge their breath against us? BOYET Under the cool shade of a sycamore I thought to close mine eyes some half an hour; 9.
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When, lo! Their herald is a pretty knavish page, That well by heart hath conn'd his embassage: Action and accent did they teach him there; 'Thus must thou speak,' and 'thus thy body bear: ' 1. And ever and anon they made a doubt Presence majestical would put him out, 'For,' quoth the king, 'an angel shalt thou see; Yet fear not thou, but speak audaciously.' The boy replied, 'An angel is not evil; I should have fear'd her had she been a devil.' With that, all laugh'd and clapp'd him on the shoulder, Making the bold wag by their praises bolder: One rubb'd his elbow thus, and fleer'd and swore A better speech was never spoke before; Another, with his finger and his thumb, 1. Cried, 'Via! PRINCESS But what, but what, come they to visit us?
BOYET They do, they do: and are apparell'd thus. Like Muscovites or Russians, as I guess. Their purpose is to parle, to court and dance; And every one his love- feat will advance Unto his several mistress, which they'll know By favours several which they did bestow. PRINCESS And will they so? ROSALINE Come on, then; wear the favours most in sight.
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KATHARINE But in this changing what is your intent? PRINCESS The effect of my intent is to cross theirs: They do it but in mocking merriment; And mock for mock is only my intent. Their several counsels they unbosom shall To loves mistook, and so be mock'd withal Upon the next occasion that we meet, With visages displayed, to talk and greet. ROSALINE But shall we dance, if they desire to't?
PRINCESS No, to the death, we will not move a foot; Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace, But while 'tis spoke each turn away her face. BOYET Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's heart, And quite divorce his memory from his part. PRINCESS Therefore I do it; and I make no doubt The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out There's no such sport as sport by sport o'erthrown, To make theirs ours and ours none but our own: So shall we stay, mocking intended game, And they, well mock'd, depart away with shame. BOYET Beauties no richer than rich taffeta. MOTH A holy parcel of the fairest dames. MOTH Out of your favours, heavenly spirits, vouchsafe Not to behold- - BIRON . BIRON Is this your perfectness?
BOYET What would you with the princess? BIRON Nothing but peace and gentle visitation. ROSALINE What would they, say they?
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- The king of Navarre's park. Enter FERDINAND king of Navarre, BIRON, LONGAVILLE and DUMAIN FERDINAND Let fame, that all hunt after in their lives, Live register'd upon our brazen tombs And then grace us in the disgrace of death; When, spite.
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BOYET Nothing but peace and gentle visitation. ROSALINE Why, that they have; and bid them so be gone. BOYET She says, you have it, and you may be gone. FERDINAND Say to her, we have measured many miles To tread a measure with her on this grass. BOYET They say, that they have measured many a mile To tread a measure with you on this grass.
ROSALINE It is not so. Ask them how many inches Is in one mile: if they have measured many, 1. The measure then of one is easily told. BOYET If to come hither you have measured miles, And many miles, the princess bids you tell How many inches doth fill up one mile.
BIRON Tell her, we measure them by weary steps. BOYET She hears herself.
ROSALINE How many weary steps, Of many weary miles you have o'ergone, Are number'd in the travel of one mile? BIRON We number nothing that we spend for you: Our duty is so rich, so infinite, 2. That we may do it still without accompt.
FERDINAND Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! ROSALINE O vain petitioner!
FERDINAND Then, in our measure do but vouchsafe one change. ROSALINE Play, music, then! Nay, you must do it soon.
Thus change I like the moon. FERDINAND Will you not dance? How come you thus estranged? ROSALINE You took the moon at full, but now she's changed. FERDINAND Yet still she is the moon, and I the man. ROSALINE Our ears vouchsafe it. FERDINAND But your legs should do it.
ROSALINE Since you are strangers and come here by chance, We'll not be nice: take hands. FERDINAND Why take we hands, then? ROSALINE Only to part friends: Curtsy, sweet hearts; and so the measure ends. FERDINAND More measure of this measure; be not nice. ROSALINE We can afford no more at such a price.
FERDINAND Prize you yourselves: what buys your company? ROSALINE Your absence only. FERDINAND That can never be. ROSALINE Then cannot we be bought: and so, adieu; Twice to your visor, and half once to you. FERDINAND If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. ROSALINE In private, then.
FERDINAND I am best pleased with that. PRINCESS Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is three. BIRON Nay then, two treys, and if you grow so nice, Metheglin, wort, and malmsey: well run, dice! There's half- a- dozen sweets. PRINCESS Seventh sweet, adieu: Since you can cog, I'll play no more with you. BIRON One word in secret.
PRINCESS Let it not be sweet. BIRON Thou grievest my gall. MARIA Name it. DUMAIN Fair lady,- - MARIA Say you so?
Fair lord,- - Take that for your fair lady. DUMAIN Please it you, As much in private, and I'll bid adieu. LONGAVILLE I know the reason, lady, why you ask. KATHARINE O for your reason! LONGAVILLE You have a double tongue within your mask, And would afford my speechless vizard half. KATHARINE Veal, quoth the Dutchman.
LONGAVILLE A calf, fair lady! KATHARINE No, a fair lord calf. LONGAVILLE Let's part the word. KATHARINE No, I'll not be your half 2. Take all, and wean it; it may prove an ox. LONGAVILLE Look, how you butt yourself in these sharp mocks!
KATHARINE Then die a calf, before your horns do grow. LONGAVILLE One word in private with you, ere I die. KATHARINE Bleat softly then; the butcher hears you cry. ROSALINE Not one word more, my maids; break off, break off. BIRON By heaven, all dry- beaten with pure scoff! FERDINAND Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple wits.
PRINCESS Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovits. BOYET Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. ROSALINE Well- liking wits they have; gross, gross; fat, fat.
PRINCESS O poverty in wit, kingly- poor flout! Will they not, think you, hang themselves tonight? ROSALINE O, they were all in lamentable cases! MARIA Dumain was at my service, and his sword: No point, quoth I; my servant straight was mute. KATHARINE Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart; And trow you what he called me? PRINCESS Qualm, perhaps.
KATHARINE Yes, in good faith. PRINCESS Go, sickness as thou art! ROSALINE Well, better wits have worn plain statute- caps. KATHARINE And Longaville was for my service born. MARIA Dumain is mine, as sure as bark on tree.
BOYET Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear: Immediately they will again be here In their own shapes; for it can never be They will digest this harsh indignity. PRINCESS Will they return? BOYET They will, they will, God knows, And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: Therefore change favours; and, when they repair, Blow like sweet roses in this summer air. BOYET Fair ladies mask'd are roses in their bud; Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown.
PRINCESS Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, 3. If they return in their own shapes to woo?